Post by Carm on May 21, 2008 7:57:54 GMT -5
Warning this may be a bit long and is based on a verbal conversation held a month or so ago. Also, despite some obvious typos and grammatical errors, I'm going to submit as is.
Brett's probably going to kill me for sharing his story, but some stories are too good to not be told....
Brett’s not a writer so I’ll take the time to describe how he celebrated his 40th birthday.
Before I go further, there is some information you must know about Brett: Despite his excellent physical conditioning and high intelligence, he
1) He hates to pull over and scout so rarely does.
2) Tends to be carefree and laid back, never nervous.
3) Often haphazardly places or misplaces items
These factors come into play during this trip……After reading an article about a river near Halifax, he decides to run the river on April 20th of this year…solo. No maps or other information available so he goes for it. Leaves his mountain bike 30kms downstream and drives up to lake put in site. Heads out into the frigid lake waters. Continues forward and becomes curious when he sees the mist and hears a curious noise appearing above what must be the lake outlet. For once curiosity prevails here and he decides to pull over at the last minute to check out what’s causing this disturbance. Imagine his surprise when he realizes there’s a dam with water flowing over the top…a clear canoe killer! After getting over the shock he begins the portage process and carries his canoe to bottom of dam. Imagine his next surprise when he returns with his gear to see that his canoe is gone! He swears the dam must have opened floodgates during his portage. I swear he must have left his canoe too close to the water. So, off he goes, running along the shoreline in search of his canoe, thrashing through the alders and tree branches, jumps into the cold water and grabbing his canoe over a kilometer downriver. Of course he must now portage his gear this extra kilometer in wet clothing.
Already an hour plus off schedule, he’s finally canoeing this great river as the clouds hover above. Not long later he starts hearing some strange noises again. Surely not another dam? Thankfully not. The noise he hears are of some nice looking rips in a gorge straight ahead. Unfortunately for Brett however, these rapids have haystacks over 6 feet high! He quickly realizes this is going to be a very raunchy stretch. By the time he goes to unfasten his PFD from the thwart (at some point did I mention he’s carefree?), it’s tool late and he tries his best to start navigating this maelstrom he’s found himself in. Within seconds his canoe is completely swamped from the standing waves and finds himself holding on with dear life to the stern of his now upside-down canoe. Huge haystacks, no shoreline due to the fact he’s in this gorge, frothy, bubbly water with almost no buoyancy, no life jacket and freezing cold water. These are the typical kinds of scenarios that Brett gets himself in to. And he wonders why I’m always trying to be the voice of reason. Somehow he’s able to hang on long enough to make to an island at the end of the rips. He uses the last of his strength to get the canoe on land as he’s heaving and coughing up large amounts of water. His lips are blue, hands are numb and he’s shaking from exhaustion. Hard to believe this guy is P.H.D. material, isn’t it?
Luckily he’s able to start a fire and dry things out. By the time he’s back on the water he’s many hours behind schedule. After paddling through many kilometers of (relatively) deadwater and hitting a few other manageable whitewater sections he realizes he’ll never make it to this takeout spot on time as he sees the sun reaching towards the horizon. Brett heads to shore, jogs down the road to his bike, then pedals the 30km stretch back up to the lake and returns to pick up his gear as the sun settles.
Story doesn’t end there. With Brett, stories never end that happily. Somehow he makes it home without falling asleep at the wheel. Drags himself into the house, lays in bed and immediately falls into a dead sleep. Until the next morning when he is woken up not by his alarm but this itchy, scratchy feeling on the back of his neck…TICKS!!! Running through the Nova Scotian woods during spring time perhaps not smartest thing to do… He ends up having to scrub down everything in his bedroom and taking multiple showers to ensure cleanliness
Now you know why my trips with Brett are always an adventure….
Happy 40th Brett!!!
Carm.
Brett's probably going to kill me for sharing his story, but some stories are too good to not be told....
Brett’s not a writer so I’ll take the time to describe how he celebrated his 40th birthday.
Before I go further, there is some information you must know about Brett: Despite his excellent physical conditioning and high intelligence, he
1) He hates to pull over and scout so rarely does.
2) Tends to be carefree and laid back, never nervous.
3) Often haphazardly places or misplaces items
These factors come into play during this trip……After reading an article about a river near Halifax, he decides to run the river on April 20th of this year…solo. No maps or other information available so he goes for it. Leaves his mountain bike 30kms downstream and drives up to lake put in site. Heads out into the frigid lake waters. Continues forward and becomes curious when he sees the mist and hears a curious noise appearing above what must be the lake outlet. For once curiosity prevails here and he decides to pull over at the last minute to check out what’s causing this disturbance. Imagine his surprise when he realizes there’s a dam with water flowing over the top…a clear canoe killer! After getting over the shock he begins the portage process and carries his canoe to bottom of dam. Imagine his next surprise when he returns with his gear to see that his canoe is gone! He swears the dam must have opened floodgates during his portage. I swear he must have left his canoe too close to the water. So, off he goes, running along the shoreline in search of his canoe, thrashing through the alders and tree branches, jumps into the cold water and grabbing his canoe over a kilometer downriver. Of course he must now portage his gear this extra kilometer in wet clothing.
Already an hour plus off schedule, he’s finally canoeing this great river as the clouds hover above. Not long later he starts hearing some strange noises again. Surely not another dam? Thankfully not. The noise he hears are of some nice looking rips in a gorge straight ahead. Unfortunately for Brett however, these rapids have haystacks over 6 feet high! He quickly realizes this is going to be a very raunchy stretch. By the time he goes to unfasten his PFD from the thwart (at some point did I mention he’s carefree?), it’s tool late and he tries his best to start navigating this maelstrom he’s found himself in. Within seconds his canoe is completely swamped from the standing waves and finds himself holding on with dear life to the stern of his now upside-down canoe. Huge haystacks, no shoreline due to the fact he’s in this gorge, frothy, bubbly water with almost no buoyancy, no life jacket and freezing cold water. These are the typical kinds of scenarios that Brett gets himself in to. And he wonders why I’m always trying to be the voice of reason. Somehow he’s able to hang on long enough to make to an island at the end of the rips. He uses the last of his strength to get the canoe on land as he’s heaving and coughing up large amounts of water. His lips are blue, hands are numb and he’s shaking from exhaustion. Hard to believe this guy is P.H.D. material, isn’t it?
Luckily he’s able to start a fire and dry things out. By the time he’s back on the water he’s many hours behind schedule. After paddling through many kilometers of (relatively) deadwater and hitting a few other manageable whitewater sections he realizes he’ll never make it to this takeout spot on time as he sees the sun reaching towards the horizon. Brett heads to shore, jogs down the road to his bike, then pedals the 30km stretch back up to the lake and returns to pick up his gear as the sun settles.
Story doesn’t end there. With Brett, stories never end that happily. Somehow he makes it home without falling asleep at the wheel. Drags himself into the house, lays in bed and immediately falls into a dead sleep. Until the next morning when he is woken up not by his alarm but this itchy, scratchy feeling on the back of his neck…TICKS!!! Running through the Nova Scotian woods during spring time perhaps not smartest thing to do… He ends up having to scrub down everything in his bedroom and taking multiple showers to ensure cleanliness
Now you know why my trips with Brett are always an adventure….
Happy 40th Brett!!!
Carm.
